Sigh of Relief

by tinysneakers

After 5 ½ months of crying, screaming, fussing, not sleeping, and most of all worrying, we’ve gotten a diagnosis for Kabes’ tummy troubles. Hopefully. I’ve learned in my short time as a mother of an infant to never count your chickens before they hatch. But I feel very, very strongly that this is the right answer.

fussy babynewborn

For the first time in almost half a year, I feel an immense sense of relief. I understand where the expression “take a weight off your shoulders” comes from. I literally feel like my shoulders are lighter. On our drive home from our follow-up GI appointment I could’ve sworn the sky was bluer and the music selection on the radio was better. For the first time in months I felt like I had the {mental} energy to go for a run. {Of course it was smack dab in the middle of a 95 degree day, so that did not happen.}

A lot of emotions are running through my head. Guilt. Frustration. Anger. Guilt. Pride. Guilt. The diagnosis we received is something that I’ve thought was wrong in the back of my mind all along, but each step of the way I was knocked down- and believed it. Each time I brought up my concern to a doctor I was given a reason I was wrong. And frankly, they were pretty good reasons. But still, in the deepest of dark depths of my sleep deprived mind, I had this nagging feeling.

sideofsneakers-2110

Let me tell you something. Time is not a requirement for mommy intuition or instinct. I doubted myself because I’ve only been caring for this tiny being for a few short months. But I’ll tell you here and now, if I’d stuck to my guns months ago, we might never have been in this sleep deprived, exasperating situation that we’ve been in.

That’s neither here nor there now though. I can’t go back and I did the best I could. Feeling guilty for not getting to the bottom of this sooner will accomplish nothing. Instead, I’m focusing on that one positive word in that list of emotions up there: pride.

smiling 5 month baby

Even with the constant battering, doubt, and denial, I stuck with my instinct. I finally said I’d had enough and I went with it. And then I proved it. And guess what? I was right. So yeah, I’m proud. If I hadn’t researched, hadn’t nagged, hadn’t fought, hadn’t not given up, we’d still be stuck. But from today on, we’re only moving forward. And I’ve learned one of many, many vital parenting lessons. Trust your gut. Always. No matter what.

Oh, the diagnosis? Allergic colitis.

surprised baby

{ 19 comments… read them below or add one }

Katie Heddleston June 22, 2012 at 7:57 am

So so happy you have answers. How’s mama gonna do eliminating those foods? Good luck Heather 🙂

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tinysneakers June 23, 2012 at 6:35 am

Well dairy and soy are already out. If something else has to go then we might run into trouble… you know all about what an eating machine bfing makes you!! 😉

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Molly Riterbeck June 22, 2012 at 8:17 am

So glad you can have an understanding and can work through it!

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Bex June 22, 2012 at 9:38 am

I went through the same thing with baby #4 and I felt clueless and helpless. Finally, after a lot of frustration with medical doctors and consulting my detox therapist, I cut dairy out of MY diet (I’m nursing), and the problem disappeared. Always trust your instincts.

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tinysneakers June 23, 2012 at 6:36 am

I’m so glad to hear you found what helped!! Sometimes you just gotta figure it out on your own. 😉 Dairy & soy are out so far… we’ll see if anything else needs to go!

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Hallie @ChasingHallie June 22, 2012 at 10:15 am

So happy that you guys found the answers you were searching for. Our baby girl, 7 1/2 months, also has allergic colitis. We discovered this, on our own, when she was 3 1/2 months old and after we changed her feeding she became a new baby! So happy.

I hope you have the same experience with your lil guy.

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tinysneakers June 23, 2012 at 6:37 am

Sorry your babe had to go through it too, but I’m so glad you were able to figure it out!! She’s such a cutie 😉

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Laura @ Mommy Run Fast June 22, 2012 at 1:37 pm

Oh, I’m so glad you got some answers! You’re exactly right about maternal intuition- it kicks in from day one with the first child. So sorry you had to deal with it for this long… we had a very fussy, gassy, challenging baby too and never did get an answer, but she somewhat outgrew it around 3-4 months…. although she’s continued to be a very high-energy, spirited little girl, so I also think some of it was personality. 🙂

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tinysneakers June 23, 2012 at 6:39 am

I think a bit of his is personality too- amazing how early it comes out! Glad your little one outgrew the fussy stage!

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Elizabeth @ The Bare Midriff June 22, 2012 at 3:00 pm

GOOD. FOR. YOU!! It’s tough and intimidating to stand up to doctors and force your voice to be heard by them. I’m SO happy you found an answer, and that that weight has been lifted from your shoulders.

Great post.

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Pavement Runner June 22, 2012 at 5:57 pm

Your baby is too stinkin cute. Glad everything seems to be headed in the right direction. Cheers.

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tinysneakers June 23, 2012 at 6:39 am

Aw thanks!

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Erin @ Girl Gone Veggie June 22, 2012 at 8:05 pm

Omg you have a RIDICULOUSLY CUTE baby. Like so so cute. Sorry I know that wasn’t the point of this post but he is such a little model baby!

I’m so sorry you’ve had to deal with months of anguish and stress. I’m so glad that you’re now finally getting some answers. I hope it gets better from here! <3

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tinysneakers June 23, 2012 at 6:40 am

Hahaa thanks!! 🙂

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Sam June 23, 2012 at 12:30 am

So glad that you guys finally received a diagnoses! Finally everything will be getting better and hopefully mommy can get some sleep!!

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Beth June 23, 2012 at 8:02 pm

So proud of you. Don’t beat yourself up for a single minute – even if it took time to push for the proper diagnosis, you were taking care of that honey-bun every day, every minute. The fault lies with our medical culture, not with you!

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Jen June 27, 2012 at 4:26 pm

I am SO glad you guys have answers, Heather! Mother’s intuition is so powerful and usually always spot on. I really hope everything improves from here on out. <3

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Hotpotatokate June 29, 2012 at 4:25 am

So glad you are making progress! Wheat helped here 🙂

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Shanna, like Banana July 3, 2012 at 12:38 pm

What a relief to finally know what is going on with your sweet baby boy. I hope that things will improve now!

And you are right, cutness overload on the post below. He’s seriously adorable! And it looks like he’s sitting up on his own..wow!

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