Last night I went to an event for a local charity that helps kids participate in sports. The event was a girls-only football clinic, so all the women could learn the game.
A little sexist? Yes. A little accurate? Yes.
I don’t mind watching football on the weekend when it means drinking beer and grilling out. But every single day, when it’s just the TV, the living room, and a football game- I get bored. Especially when I don’t know what’s going on.
The clinic was lead by former NFL and college football players. It was a great idea in theory, but they did a poor job of actually teaching us about the game. I mean, you get a bunch of football players together and what are they gonna do? Play football. Not teach girls.
So here’s my version of football 101, a sad side effect of the TV constantly being tuned to ESPN.
(And though I will never admit it to the husband, a 4 hour game is much more bearable when you know what’s going on.)
Football 101
Before we start, let’s get one thing clear: football is not like soccer or hockey where the offensive & defensive players of the same team are on the field at the same time.
In football, the team that has possession of the ball (trying to score) has their offense on the field. The other team has their defense on the field and is trying to stop the other team from scoring. To add to the confusion, there’s a whole other set of players called “special teams”- they do stuff like kick field goals and punts.
How to Score
The way to get the most points at one time is to get a touchdown (6 points). A touchdown happens when the scoring team runs the ball into the end zone or catches a pass in the end zone.
After a touchdown, the team has 2 choices: kick the ball between goals posts for an extra point, or line up at the two yard line and run or catch the ball in the end zone.
You can score 3 points by kicking a field goal- an option teams might go for if they don’t think they’ll be able to get the 10 yards in their 4th attempt at a 1st down.
(You can also get 2 points by getting a safety, but I don’t think it happens much. It’s when the opponent has the ball and gets tackled in their end zone.)
What’s a Down?
A down is essentially a play. The team with the ball has 4 chances to move the ball 10 yards. (Sounds easy, right? Apparently not so.) Each time a play ends, it’s a down. If they get to 10 yards, they start over with a first down and get another 4 chances to move the ball 10 yards.
When you hear stuff like “3rd and 8” or “2nd and 3”, it means the down they’re on and the number of yards they’ve gone. (So 3rd down and by 8 yards, or 2nd down and 3 yards.)
On each down, the players line up just like they do at the beginning of the game: offense on one side, defense on the other, and the center snaps the ball to the quarterback. What happens next depends on what play they’ve decided on. (More on positions below.) Where the ball starts is called “the line of scrimmage”.
If the team doesn’t move 10 yards in 4 downs, the other team gets the ball, so on the 4th down, the usually do 1 of 2 things: kick a field goal (if they’re close enough) or punt the ball down the field (so it’s farther from the end zone when the other team gets it.)
The Players
There’s 11 guys allowed on each team on the field at one time. Here’s some of them:
Offense
Center: He’s literally in the center of the offensive line- he starts the play by “hiking” the ball to the quarterback. (You know, the one that bends over with his butt in the air & has the ball on the ground between his legs.) It’s called the “snap”.
Quarterback: If you can only stand to know one player, know this one. He’s the guy that catches the snap from the center. He can either run with the ball, throw it to a player down the field, or pass it to another player. He’s the ringleader- he executes the plays the coach decides, or calls an “audible” if he thinks he needs to change the play on the field.
Offensive guard: The 2 guys that line up on either side of the center.
Offensive tackle: The 2 guys that line up either side of the guards.
Tight end: Plays next to the tackle. (This series of players makes up the “offensive line”).
Wide receivers: Their job is to get open to receive a pass down the field.
Running back: Runs the ball down the field.
Fullback: They run, they block, they receive. They do it all.
Defense
Nose guard: Across from the offensive teams center; blocks plays down the center of the field.
Defensive tackle: Linemen that rush the passer.
Defensive ends: Block plays on the outside edges of the defensive line.
Linebacker: Rush the passer, cover receivers, do what needs to be done.
Cornerback: Block the wide receivers.
Safety: The last line of defense. There’s 2: the strong safety is stronger and blocks runs; the free safety is faster and blocks passes.
Special teams
Just know they come out for kicks, punts, extra points, field goals, etc.
That’s enough football for now. Coming up: Part II- penalties & other things you should know!
*Disclaimer: Don’t blame me if this is not entirely accurate. It comes purely from osmosis- I can’t help what goes into my brain after endless hours of football on my TV at home. Nobody tell the husband that I know what’s going on- it’ll only encourage him to watch even more. If that’s possible.




{ 20 comments… read them below or chime in }
I Love this! I did a post like this last year, too
I’m a college football addict.
The more you know, the more you watch. And the more you watch, the more you love
Man, I had NO idea that the offense and defense were on the field at different times!
I’m with you, I have NO clue whats going on, I just sit and zone out when Handsome Boyfriend and his friends watch games and yell.
Reason #442 why I love you. This rocks, teach other ladies to GET in the game:)
This is awesome! I have watched so many football games with almost no idea what is going on. I just watch the guys to know when to cheer!
Thank you thank you for this!!!
Whoa, whoa, whoa. The whole team isn’t even out there at the same time? That is nuts. I had no idea.
I’ve never been able to like football. I like soccer. Baseball. Basketball. But Football? I just get bored. And I still don’t understand the whole slapping each other on the butt when something good happens either….
Haha yeah, football’s supposed to a manly man sport…yet the slap butts and hug each other all game long
Thanks for this! I’ve been trying to understand football for months now, and this definitely helped!
I need to bookmark this! Im getting better at the actual game watching but the truth is I go for the food + beer!
The food and beer will always win in my book
I’m totally bookmarking this. I consider myself a smart girl, but I have NO IDEA what’s going on with football…beyond watching boys and drinking beer.
Wait..there’s more to it than that? Haha
I loved watching football until a last year when someone came to our hometown team that I refused to watch do anything. Unfortunately, he’s still here and is not starting QB. I think I’ll stick to playing touch football rather than watching it on tv. Very good explanation! I know a few people I should send over here to read this.
OMG – I looooove this! I decided to watch more football this year and I always thought that I knew the basics – and I guess I do!!! …I will say that it’s the penalties where I get confused… Thanks – I look forward to part 2!!!
Ahhhh, I’m bookmarking this!!! I always try to watch football, but I never have any idea what’s going on!!
Go Patriots!
LOL.
Maybe we should start a health bloggers fantasy football league now that you ladies are picking it up.
I love this. I was lucky to have a very patient drum line in High School explain the game to me while we watched between songs.
I am totally printing these posts out and keeping them in my living room for Sunday football watching! I’m constantly asking my husband questions about what everyone’s position is, what they do…you get the point. You’re a life saver – now I won’t feel so moronic about the game!
Love your post! Check out my site if u get a chance…we breakdown everything football from a girls point of view. I’d love to link to your site!! Hope you’re enjoying the season a little more this year!
http://Www.chick101footballforgirls.com
Cheers!
Molly
Despite growing up in a football crazed family, I knew nothing about it other than to cheer when everyone else was cheering. My husband and I are fans, but there are still moments where I have to look to him to figure out what just happened. This totally helps!
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